Q: What do you put in a toaster?
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A: The answer is bread. If you said "toast," then give up
now and go do something else before you hurt yourself. If
you said "bread", go to the next question.
***
Q: Say "silk" five times. Now, spell "silk." What do cows
drink?
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A: Cows drink water. If you said "milk", please do not
attempt the next question. Your brain is obviously over-
stressed and may even overheat. It may be that you need
to content yourself with reading something more appropriate
such as "Children's World." If you said "water", then
proceed to the next question.
***
Q: If a red house is made with red bricks, a blue house is
made with blue bricks, a pink house is made with pink bricks,
a black house is made with black bricks, what is a greenhouse
made with?
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A: Greenhouses are made from glass. If you said "green
bricks," what the heck are you still doing here reading
these questions? If you said "glass", then go on to the next
question.
***
Q: Twenty years ago, a plane is flying at 20,000 feet over
Germany. If you will recall, Germany at the time was
politically divided into West Germany and East Germany.
Anyway, during the flight, TWO of the engines fail. The
pilot, realizing that the last remaining engine is also
failing, decides on a crash landing. Unfortunately, the
engine fails before he has time and the plane crashes smack
in the middle of "no-man's-land" between East Germany and
West Germany. Where would you bury the survivors - East
Germany or West Germany or in "no-man's-land?"
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A: You don't, of course, bury the survivors. If you said
ANYTHING else, you are a real dunce and you must NEVER try to
rescue anyone from a plane crash. Your efforts would not be
appreciated... If you said, "Don't bury the survivors" then
proceed to the next question.
***
Q: If the hour hand on a clock moves 1/60th of a degree every
minute, then how many degrees will the hour hand move in one
hour?
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A: One degree. If you said "360 degrees" or anything else
other than "one degree", you are to be congratulated on
getting this far, but you are obviously out of your league.
Turn your pencil in and exit the room. Everyone else proceed
to the final question.
***
Q: Without using a calculator - You are driving a bus from
London to Milford Haven in Wales. In London, 17 people get
on the bus. In Reading, six people get off the bus and nine
people get on. In Swindon, two people get off and four get
on. In Cardiff, 11 people get off and 16 people get on.
In Swansea, three people get off and five people get on. In
Carmathen, six people get off and three get on. You then
arrive at Milford Haven. Now, what was the name of the bus
driver?
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A: Oh, for Heaven's sake... It was you!