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| New Slang Dictionary, 2001 |
| AEROPLANE BLONDE One who has bleached or dyed her hair but still has a 'black box'. AUSSIE KISS Similar to a French Kiss, but given down under. BADLY PACKED KEBAB A vulgar (but still excellent) term for the female genitalia BEAVER LEAVER A homosexual (male) BEER COAT The invisible, but warm coat worn when walking home after a booze cr uise at 3 in the morning. BEER COMPASS The invisible device that ensures your safe arrival home after a boo ze cruise, even though you're too pissed to remember where you live, ho w you got there, and where you've come from. BEER SCOOTER The ability to get home after a night out on the booze and not remem ber it i.e. "I don't even remember getting home last night, I must have caught the beer scooter". BOBFOC Body Off Baywatch, Face Off Crimewatch. BREAKING THE SEAL Your first piss in the pub, usually after 2 hours of solid drinking. After breaking the seal of your bladder, repeat visits to the toilet will be required every 10 or 15 minutes for the rest of the night. BRITNEY SPEARS Modern slang for 'beers', e.g. "Couple of Britneys please, Doreen". BRUCE LEE Erect nipple (as in, a hard Nip). BUDGIE'S TONGUE or SMALL MAN IN A BOAT, or TONGUE PUNCHBAG The female erection. BUNNY-BOILER An unhinged and overly possessive woman. From the rabbit boiling sce ne in the film "Fatal Attraction", e.g. " I don't like the look of that aeroplane blonde - could be a bunny boiler". COCK-A-DOODLE-POO The bowel movement that, needing to come out urgently, wakes you up in the morning to get to the toilet quick. DOUBLE BASS A sexual position in which the man enters the woman from behind, and then fiddles with the woman's nipples with one hand and her Budgie's tongue with the other. The position is similar to that used when playing the double bass instrument, but the sound produced is slight ly different. DRINK-LINK A modern term for a cashpoint machine (ATM). Named so because it is common to visit one before going out on the booze. ETCH-A-SKETCH Trying to draw a smile on a woman's face by twiddling both her nippl es simultaneously. FLOGGING ON Surfing the Internet for some left-handed websites. FREE THE TADPOLES Liberate the residents of the Wank Tanks. FRIGMAROLE Unnecessarily time-consuming foreplay. F***SH*TF***SH*TF***SH*T The sound made when driving through too narrow a gap at too high a s peed. GOING FOR A McSH*T Entering a fast food restaurant with no intention of buying food, yo u're just going to the bog. If challenged by a pimply staff member, your declaration to them that you'll buy their food afterwards is called a "McSh*t With Lies". GREYHOUND A very short skirt, only an inch from the hare. HAND-TO-GLAND COMBAT A vigorous masturbation session. JOHNNY-NO-STARS A young man of substandard intelligence, the typical adolescent who works in a burger restaurant. The 'no stars' comes from the badges displaying stars that staff at fast-food restaurants often wear to s how their level of training. McSPLURRY The type of bowel movement you experience after dining for a week in fast food restaurants. MILLENNIUM DOMES The contents of a Wonderbra, i.e. extremely impressive when viewed f rom the outside, but there's actually f***-all in there worth seeing. MONKEY BATH A bath so hot, that when lowering yourself in, you go "Oo! Ool Oo! A a! Aa! Aa!". MUMBLER An attractive girl in tight shorts or jeans, etc i.e. you can see th e 'lips' moving but can't quite make out what they're saying. MYSTERY BUS The bus that arrives at the pub on Friday night while you're in the toilet after your 10th pint, and whisks away all the unattractive pe ople so the pub is suddenly packed with stunners when you come back in. MYSTERY TAXI The taxi that arrives at your place on Saturday morning before you w ake up, whisks away the stunner you slept with, and leaves a 10-pinter i n your bed instead. NBR (NO BEERS REQUIRED) Someone that you'd chat up instantly in the pub. The opposite of a 10-pinter. NELSON MANDELA Rhyming slang for "Stella" (the lager). ONE IN THE DEPARTURE LOUNGE The need to defecate imminently. PEARL HARBOUR Cold (weather). An example of it would be - "It's a bit Pearl Harbou r out there!" Meaning - there's a nasty 'nip' in the air. PICASSO ARSE A woman whose knickers are too small for her, so she looks like she' s got 4 buttocks. RAGMAN'S COAT Untidy and unkempt pubic hair e.g. "That mumbler looks quite fit, bu t I bet she's got a kebab like a ragmans coat!" RELEASE A CHOCOLATE HOSTAGE To defecate e.g. "I've got one in the departure lounge, so I'm just nipping out to release a chocolate hostage". SALAD DODGER An excellent phrase for an overweight person. SKIN-CHIMNEY - see BADLY PACKED KEBAB SPERM WAIL or SPUPHEMISM A verbal outburst during the male orgasm. STARFISH TROOPER or ARSETRONAUT A homosexual SWAMP-DONKEY A deeply unattractive woman TART FUEL or BITCH PISS Bottled Alcopops, e.g Hooch, regularly consumed by young woman. TEN-PINTER Someone that you'd only chat up after drinking at least 10 pints. TITANIC A lady who goes down the first time out. TODGER DODGER A lesbian. TWO-BAGGER or DOUBLE BAGGER Someone that you'd need 2 paper bags to have sex with (one to cover their head, and one to cover yours, just incase their bag falls off) .. UP ON THE BLOCKS Menstruating i.e. Out of action, a bit like a car in a garage, e.g. "I don't think I'll be in luck tonight lads, the missus is up on the blocks". VAGINA DECLINER A homosexual (male) WALLACE AND GROMIT Rhyming slang for 'Vomit'. WANK SIANCE During a masturbation session, the eerie feeling that you're being watched with disgust by your dead relatives. WYNONA RYDER Rhyming slang for 'cider'. e.g. "Pint of Wynona, half a Nelson and a bottle of Tart Fuel please Doreen". X-PILES Unwanted visitors from Uranus. |
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