| Home | Newest Jokes | Funny Pictures | Funny Videos |
| An Indiana Republican Gets a New Look |
| The scene is Indiana in May of 2003; the President is visiting and is preparing to make a speech on taxes. The lead speaker is the extremely well-dressed and impeccably groomed Republian minority leader Brian Bosma. After he finishes his introduction, he is introduced the White House staffers who are in charge of image and publicity. Bosma walks up to them, resplendent in an expensive, tailored pinstriped suit, silk tie and matching pocket square. starched white shirt and polished black shoes. The staffers look him over, look at each other and shake their heads. They then walk around him, and take in the suit, the tie, the shoes, the whole look. Bosma: Is something wrong? Staffer #1: You're too well-dressed. Too dignified. We have to bring you down a few pegs. We want regular folks here, not someone in an Armani suit and a silk tie. We have to turn you into Joe Sixpack. Bosma: A Joe Sixpack! But this is how I always dress. I am... Staffer #2: I think we'll start with the shoes. How much did they cost? Bosma: My shoes? Five hundred. Staffer #2: Too expensive and they're too shiny. And Joe Sixpack wouldn't wear wingtips. Take your shoes off. Bosma: What! Staffer #1: And the socks, too. Joe Sixpack doesn't wear fancy black dress socks. We're always getting criticized for being the party of the wealthy. Bosma: But my shoes and socks! Isn't there another way? Staffer #2: Aren't you a good Republican? Bosma sits down and pulls off his expensive shoes and then his socks. The staffers take them and place them in a cardboard box. Staffer #1: You'll get them back later. Now give me that silk tie, and the handkerchief in your pocket. And the cufflinks and the Rolex, and are those SUSPENDERS?! Hand 'em over. Bosma: But why?! Staffer #2: We gotta humble you, don't you get it? Now TAKE OFF THAT TIE! Bosma, now barefoot and tieless, with his cuffs open, starts to button his jacket and shirt, but the staffers stop him. "We want the relaxed ordinary-guy look!" Bosma: But I ALWAYS wear a suit and tie...and shoes! Staffer #1: We have shoes for you. The staffer hands him a pair of work boots, covered with mud and a pair of white socks. Bosma just sighs. Then the staffers stop; it's time to begin. "We couldn't find overalls in time. You're gonna have to wear the suit, but DON'T button it, and try to lose the dignified, successful look, and slump when you walk!" Bosma nods and asks: "Should I pretend to be a janitor or something like that?" The staffers stop and stare at him in shock: "THAT WOULDN'T BE HONEST!!!" |
| Submitted By: Anonymous... |
Home - Privacy Policy
Site Copyright �2003-2007 Nick Hemingway